Tag Archives: gifs

Eight Thoughts I Have While Using The NoseFrida

You’re sharing cuddles wth your baby when all of a sudden it sounds like a little piglet entered the room. Upon further investigation, you realize it was your little cutie pie who’s all stuffed up. Time to get the NoseFrida out!

Nose Frida

When a friend of mine first told me about this product that I “had to get” when I was doing my registry, I quickly added it to both my Amazon and Target registries, but then I looked it up. You suck the snot out of your baby’s nose! EW! I was quick to dismiss it, and put on a regular bulb instead.

It wasn’t until my baby shower, a relative of mine actually had hers there and demonstrated on her baby. The boogies don’t come anywhere near your mouth, and it’s way more functionable than the bulb.  I put it back on my registry to remember to purchase it down the road when baby arrived.

Ever since buying it, I’ve had a love/hate relationship with it. It gets the job done really well so mommy loves it, but Sloane is a giant wiggle worm.  I’ve turned it into somewhat of a production, telling my six month old that she’s, “getting a visit from Auntie Frida,” and usually follow it up with “because she’s hungry,” or “she wants to eat your boogies!” Yeah, I know, she doesn’t understand what I’m saying, but her face still lights up. By the way, the Aunt Frida reference is because I had a Great Aunt Freida growing up!

Like I said, it’s a production! Here are eight thoughts that go through my head as I’m NoseFrida-ing her:

  1. It’s that time…I hope this goes well! maekg
  2. Please, no wiggling! wiggling baby
  3. And, let’s keep the screaming to a minimum. Pretty little liars aria
  4. OK, so far so good. whew
  5. How have I gotten nothing out so far? louis-c-k
  6. Oh, wait. Here it comes. tumblr_inline_noa26r9rbm1qezleh_500
  7. OMG, look at those boogies! nene leakes
  8. SUCCESS! brush your shoulders off

 

Guys…I’m Back…And I Got Jokes!

Wow – what a hiatus! I don’t even have anything interesting to report on. Just super-busy at work, so much so, that I’ve been bringing it home on the weekends. The only interesting thing really happening is that I started running again – I’ll be doing the Oakley Women’s 10k in June, and thought it sounded like fun (I may be a masochist) to run a half marathon on my birthday in October. Now that’s how you celebrate thirty-fuckin’-two!

I thought of a good post yesterday, which is why I’m returning today. I love my husband to pieces, and even after almost four years of marriage and almost five years of cohab, I still can’t get over how gross it is to live with boys. I grew up an only child, and my dad is a pretty prim-and-propper man, so I never had to deal with the toilet seat up, snot rockets or loud hacking sounds on a daily basis. I thought I’d defy all only-children stereotypes, and share with you my life with him on a daily basis:

When I think I smell my husband’s fart:

When I ask him if he farted:

That moment he realizes he needs to talk to me after he just shoveled food in his mouth:

My face after he hocks and spits in public:

And my face when he shoots a snot rocket in public:

When he burps over me speaking:

When I realize even though he’s gross I’m the luckiest girl in the world:


Morning, Laurie.

Things All Fake Blondes Know to be True

Being blonde really is more fun, but the road there is a hairy bitch!

You’re bored with your look and think blonde highlights sound like fun!

You let the hairdresser know you want them subtle – no zebra-looking hair

While under the drier you’re super excited about your new look

But while flipping through the latest issue of Glamour, realize just how cute Zooey Deschanel is with her brunette locks and for a split second doubt yourself

zooey deschanel

 

 

 

 

All doubt fades when your hairdresser starts blowdrying your golden, sun-kissed locks

blow drying hair

And when she’s done, you take one look in the mirror and you feel like a goddess

Your friends and family fawn over how great you look

mean girls

You go about your life feeling wonderful until your roots start to grow in

roots

You call to make an appointment for a touch-up, but your favorite stylist isn’t available for another month

It’s finally time for your appointment and your hairdresser is disgusted, and practically shoves you in her chair

When she’s done you realize you’re blonder than before…And you LOVE IT

blonde is a lifestyle

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The upkeep becomes pricey, time-consuming, and the chemicals wreak havoc on what’s left of your hair, but you wouldn’t have it any other way as being blonde makes you feel best!

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